Onion Jokes 2

onion jokes headerOnion Modified Commonly Posted Question/Answer Jokes

  1. How do you keep from ‘crying’ when peeling an onion?
  2. How many onions do you need to make soup?
  3. Waiter, will my onion rings be long?
  4. Why did the onion lie down for a rest?
  5. A helper at the farmer’s market is 5’ 4” tall.  What does she weigh?
  6. If there are 3 onions and you take away 2, how many do you have?

  1. How do you keep from ‘crying’ when peeling an onion?
    Have your sister peel it for you!
  2. How many onions do you need to make soup?
    I don’t know. I didn’t know onions could cook!
  3. Waiter, will my onion rings be long?
    No sir, they will be round!
  4. Why did the onion lie down for a rest?
    Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  5. A helper at the farmer’s market is 5’ 4” tall.  What does she weigh?
    Onions, beans, tomatoes,…
  6. If there are 3 onions and you take away 2, how many do you have?
    YOU have 2.

Commonly Posted Question/Answer Jokes, Unmodified 

  1. How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?  Put him in the front seat.
  2. How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?  I don’t know. I didn’t think sheep could knit!
  3. Waiter, will my pizza be long?  No sir, it will be round!
  4. Why did the banana go to the doctor?  Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  5. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?  Meat
  6. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?  2

jokes mid line

little sunshine onion

While searching for jokes that would work as onion jokes, one joke stood out is making no sense when I first read it; nor did comprehension come the next time I read it. When at last I saw the light, it sure was fun. Maybe you will be as my family members and grasp it immediately? Here goes:

What did 0 say to 8? 

think

think

think

Nice belt!

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