Onion Modified Commonly Posted Question/Answer Jokes
- How do you keep from ‘crying’ when peeling an onion?
- How many onions do you need to make soup?
- Waiter, will my onion rings be long?
- Why did the onion lie down for a rest?
- A helper at the farmer’s market is 5’ 4” tall. What does she weigh?
- If there are 3 onions and you take away 2, how many do you have?
- How do you keep from ‘crying’ when peeling an onion?
Have your sister peel it for you! - How many onions do you need to make soup?
I don’t know. I didn’t know onions could cook! - Waiter, will my onion rings be long?
No sir, they will be round! - Why did the onion lie down for a rest?
Because it wasn’t peeling well. - A helper at the farmer’s market is 5’ 4” tall. What does she weigh?
Onions, beans, tomatoes,… - If there are 3 onions and you take away 2, how many do you have?
YOU have 2.
Commonly Posted Question/Answer Jokes, Unmodified
- How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car? Put him in the front seat.
- How many sheep do you need to make a sweater? I don’t know. I didn’t think sheep could knit!
- Waiter, will my pizza be long? No sir, it will be round!
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
- A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh? Meat
- If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have? 2
While searching for jokes that would work as onion jokes, one joke stood out is making no sense when I first read it; nor did comprehension come the next time I read it. When at last I saw the light, it sure was fun. Maybe you will be as my family members and grasp it immediately? Here goes:
What did 0 say to 8?
think
think
think
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Nice belt!